Snitty Neighbors II
I’m happy to have a medium (how could I resist?) to share my saga. It really does help to lay the tangled threads down, sort them out, see what I think, get support and feedback, and perhaps an insight I have in to my personal predicament may help someone else. And certainly vice-versa. So here’s to community building! My neighbor called the cops on me again. They were here Friday night, because I put some leaves in the ‘moat’ in front of the garden, which for some reason distressed her. I think it’s not on her property line at all, the moat (it was level before we got new roads. Now it floods, and the length is 22 feet, which is a lot of top soil expense, for something I didn’t cause, so I’ve been reaching toward an elegant solution. She hated the wood pieces and threw them all away, I saw them sticking out of her trash bin and confronted her, some of you may recall, and she ran in the house, head down, not looking, not answering. Big clue to the curious, there, her fear of confrontation, and a big step for me, who historically flees from it. But it backfired, because I’m sure that’s why she call the police. Not the leaves. I saw her in a weakened state, which gave me the power and she cannot have that.)
I got permission from the home owners assoc. to put up a little fence around the garden area, to keep her from fiddling with it (anything I put in there ends up being thrown in the garden or dumped in my driveway, yet she accuses me of trespassing. Don’t touch my stuff). The manager said, “You two need to be on the same page about this” so I wrote her a note to tell her I had permission, and since I never see her, she won’t speak to me (suits me fine) and I don’t know her last name (i like our mail carrier but did you know it’s against the law for him to put a card in a neighbor’s box? Did not know that). So in the interest of communication, I taped said note to her front door. And she called the cops. It’s not like I pissed on her steps, though in retrospect I should have.
Now, this is laughably ludicrous except for this chilling fact: if you have three ‘incidents’ of upset, your pissed off neighbor can go to court and take out a harassment order against you. And should you violate it, it’s a criminal offense. I am not a criminal. I want flowers and peace, and I want her to slither back from the ugly friggin’ rock she crawled out of, but now that she realizes how super fun it is to toy with me, she’s not going anywhere soonly.
I need to stop poking at her but she has thrown down the proverbial gauntlet by bringing in the law. I ended the note by saying she is more than welcome to hire a surveyor and put up her own fence, thus ending the confusion about where the property lines are. She won’t do either. It’s expensive (i did some research. It’s crazy, the quotes are nearly 2000 bucks. I don’t care where the line is. Just stop throwing stuff on my plants).
So if you believe in God, please pray for me. And for her. And if you don’t, please hold out the thought that it would be better for all involved if she were to move, lol. And should you believe in the devil, and I’m starting to guess she does, well, perhaps you can explain to me how making others miserable is enjoyable sport. Because I quite frankly don’t understand.
Thanks for listening. I do appreciate it. It’s way cheaper than therapy, and possibly, probably, in many cases, more effective (I will never again ‘do’ therapy, as the last time I tried, my son had an abusive first grade teacher (I was the ‘room mother’ so I had a good eye-full). The therapist shamed me for my emotional involvement. Like I’m supposed to smile and say, “It will make him a better person to be treated like a salamander. My precious son, whom I have protected against the nasty ugly of the world, now has his face pressed up against it and there is nothing I can do” (I went to the principal and she said, smiling wide, “We all love Mrs. M. If you’re unhappy take him out.” And so we did. But I smelled lots of lies. And I smell them next door as well. And cops or no cops, I will not tolerate bastardization of the truth. Last night’s note cost me a harassment strike. I need to watch my step, but I was not harassing.